1/12/26: Why Wanting More Income Doesn’t Make You Selfish (And What Your ‘Why’ Really Means)

As 2025 was coming to a close, I spent time working through my 2026 plan. I told ChatGPT something, and the response caused me to have an overflow of emotions.  

I made a passing comment about one of the goals of my business being income related because I wanted to be able to provide two unique, significant offers to two of my family members.  Sadly, I followed that up with telling ChatGPT that made me feel icky because I serve people.  Here’s what he said back to me – “Wanting to help people and wanting income are not competing values.”

This response really got me thinking about why I am a business coach.

Above everything else, I am a wife and a mom.  Even when I am working in my business, my family comes first – they are my motivation to succeed, and also what keeps me grounded in why I do what I do.  I am proud that my daughters see me pursuing a dream, being a business owner, and balancing multiple facets of life with what I feel is grace and strength.  

I also think about what I want coaching to do for my family in the future.  I mentioned having income related goals.  I would love to pay for art school for my daughter, if she chooses to pursue it.  She spends a lot of time talking about how it isn’t a practical career path, but in the next 4 ½ years I hope she is convinced that is is okay to chase her passions.  

This is one of those anchoring reasons Chat GPT reminded me about.  As much as I care about my servant motivations, when I am remembering why I do what I do, why I am willing to ride the ups and downs of a new business, I think about what I am trying to do for my family.  

There is another side of connecting with my “why” and that has to do with serving others and guiding them away from making the critical mistakes I made years ago as I balanced my life and work.  Whenever I work with clients or share with others what I do and why I do it, I make it a point to share my lowest point which brought me to where I am.  

You see, about seven years ago, if you had asked me what the most important thing in my life was, I would’ve said my family.  If you had looked at my life, that would’ve been confusing.  I poured all of my time, effort, and energy into a job that looking back wasn’t even that important to me.  It drained me physically and emotionally, to the point I started drinking to cope with feelings of failure and inadequacy, at work and at home.  The more I poured into my work, the more glasses of wine I found myself pouring at night.  One night, my six year old (at the time) daughter, curled up on my lap and said, “mommy, your breath smells like wine.  It smells like wine a lot lately.”  Man, what a punch to the gut!  In that moment, I knew things needed to change.  My actions needed to start aligning with words.  Over the next few years I made significant changes that made my family first…truly first.

When I think about my purpose and “why” in my business, outside my income goals, I think about my burning desire to never see another woman feel the way I did during that period of my life.  I want women to see that balance does not mean equal.  Being a wife and mom does not mean you cannot work.  Being a woman who works does not mean you cannot be a wife and mother.  Having a demanding job does not mean you need to give all of yourself.  I want women to see you can have anything and everything you dreamed of in exactly the ratios you desire.  

Women feel like they need to work hard, do more, be more, but really, these are pressures we put on ourselves.  All we need to do is understand what is important to us and live our lives according to those priorities and the values we set for ourselves.  And check back with that “why”.  When you really wonder why you are doing what you are doing or aren’t doing what you should be, what is your “why”?  Take some time on a regular basis to sit with it and make sure everything is lining up.  

Our “why” will drive us, we just need to make sure we dig deep and understand what it really is.  Tear back all layers, understand it at all levels – why is it important for me to put my family first?  Why is it important to give my daughter the opportunity to go to art school?  Why do I want to help other women avoid the pain I felt?  Take time, connect, allow yourself to be emotional, and get very clear.  A clear “why” will drive you to success.  A disconnect will keep you wandering.

Have you visited your “why” lately?  What do those self-evaluations usually look like?  

If your why feels fuzzy, priorities don’t match the calendar, or you want success without burnout or guilt, let’s sit down and chat.  I love helping women gain clarity, confidence, and balance.  If you want to get on my calendar for a short chat, click HERE.